Below I have listed some examples of why we are stuck, or don’t live these dreams, which are key to understand; since one, or several of these can teach us what we need to unlock:
- the dream is so big so we feel overwhelmed and do not know where to begin.
- we have dreams and hopes to improve our weaknesses – which can be discouraging, as it is very hard, or next to impossible as an adult to get very good at something where we are lacking talent.
- we are busy supporting other people’s agendas and making their dreams more important than our own.
- we get distracted doing too many other things than working towards our dream.
- we cannot formulate our dream(s) and make it (them) specific enough.
- we do not set off enough time to fantasize, visualize and see ourselves realizing our dream.
- we are too committed to being comfortable and are not willing to go through ‘fire’ to reach our dream.
- we lack the self-discipline, tenacity, endurance, patience and fighting spirit that it take to reach our dream.
- we do not take the necessary time to create and develop the new habits required to reach out dream.
- we might give up when we have no fun on our journey, or when it is too hard, or when we experience no flow.
- we don’t have the courage to go after the dream, as we are afraid of what will be expected of us when we have reached the goal. Some of us are as much, or perhaps more afraid of success than failure.
- we have too many dreams and goals and we fall short because we can’t aim at them all at once.
- the timing in our lives is not right- either in terms of relationships, health, work, the market, the environment, or the rest of the world where we want to operate.
- there are tings that we need to sort out and clear before we can work towards the dream, something that captures our energy and attention and away from our dream.
- our dream may require a completely different, and sometimes permanent change of routine in our lives, which can put us face-to-face with our inner demons and gremlins that frighten and stop us.
Did you identify some or several of the above reasons for why you are not living your dream(s)? Where is your growing edge? What can you address which can clear your path and help you begin living the life of your dreams and your desires?
Some thoughts on the way:
- To achieve a dream goal requires that we stop doing something in order to give space for the new. As Steve Jobs said, “I’m as proud of what we don’t do as I am of what we do.”
- It takes approximately 21-28 days to create a new habit, since that is how long it takes to create the synaptic pathways in our brain. Repeating a pattern over and over again all of a sudden makes something we used to struggle with easy – because we have learned it.
- We need to get creative about finding the necessary support we need to embark upon and achieve our dreams and goals. Many of us will never achieve what we long for – all by ourselves. We simply don’t have what it takes all on our own. (Otherwise we would not have struggled for a long time). We need a structure and a support system in place that can lead us the way through the thick forest of unknown territory.
So, if I may give advice – let’s not feel bad about not having achieved our goal or dream yet. Let’s not give up. Instead, let’s find out where we keep ourselves short and if needed, begin searching for someone who can support us – to hold our hand the first steps – someone who is more experienced within the territory to show the way – until we one day feel assured and confident enough in our own capacity to continue on our own.