I assume you wish to experience constructive relationships where respect and kindness flow and where you feel connected.
So let’s take a look at one area where we can get lost in relationships…
There are many factors that play a part in obtaining constructive and rewarding relationships. Over the next few days, I will share a communication model called ABEAR – which I learned more than fifteen years ago and which has served me well.
A stands for Acknowledge. Our ability to show genuine interest in what other people have to say is key to successful communication.
How do you normally acknowledge a person who is bringing up an issue, a problem, or a challenge with you? How interested are you in hearing what they have to say?
If you are more concerned with making your own points, or are busy doing something other than acknowledging and listening to the other-; then the person talking to you will most likely not feel heard. Communication will break down, if you do not listen and truly care.
The first step in reducing or eliminate conflicts, is therefore to acknowledge the person expressing him or herself. Stop what else is keeping you busy, look at the person speaking and pay attention without interruption.
Conflicts can fire up quickly if the person speaking does not get to finish their point before the other person jump in to argue or defend. Do you recognize yourself in this?
If you are the one wanting to be heard – you can ask for attention and to finish your point without being interrupted.
Asking for what you want is crucial. We need to train people around us in what we need from them in order to feel heard.