…and I did not shed a tear…
…as I handed over the keys to the house that our family have lived in for the past eleven years. We finished another chapter, ready to turn the page and begin anew.
I was not emotional as I said my goodbyes. For a moment I wondered why… In the past, I have been very emotional, often with big crocodile tears rolling down my cheeks! I realized that this time I felt different, because I knew that this day had been coming for more than a year.
I therefore prepared myself by soaking up for the last time the gorgeous surrounding that I have had the fortune to experience. Every season I knew would be the last with all that it had to offer and I have experienced it in its entirety.
I have seen my surroundings with new eyes and have been much more present. It has been very enriching and fulfilling to dive so completely into living life this way. Today, I feel complete with what I have had and where I have lived more so than any other place I have resided before.
I have learned that when we live to the fullest, there are no regrets in lost opportunities. It is easier to be grateful for what we have had, and also to let go and not try to hold on to things, when we fully appreciate and live out our experiences and what we have while we have it.
My husband and I have for the third time celebrated our friends’ marriage with a big party. The 1st time was when they got married the 3rd of June 1995.
The second time, when we celebrated their 10-year anniversary the 3rd of June 2005, and today 20 years later have we celebrated their love for each other once again.
I think it is a beautiful commitment that our friends made to one other when they agreed to renew their vows with the same wedding guests every 10 years. It is for sure a great achievement to live with love year after year, and stay with one another and endure and work through tough and challenging years.
What goes wrong…?
What if more couples decided to celebrate their love and anniversary in a more engaged way? Would fewer couple take each other for granted? Would more marriages be happy and survive?
When a person has more energy and time – than engaging things to do.
Do you sometimes feel bored? There are for sure many students on school vacation and even graduate students that are feeling bored right now, unless they are vacationing with friends, have found a summer job, or something that feels meaningful for them to do.
A student’s life is most often completely packed with schoolwork (which also many think is boring) and extra curricular activities. When the daily routine is gone, and nothing is scheduled, many free students do not know what to do with themselves and their time, unless they are engaged in sports, or some hobby. Not only students feel this way…. many people who regularly are working long hours have a hard time doing nothing, or too little during their vacations.
To be bored can feel painful and like a real energy drainer, which is why most people get busy occupying themselves doing something, and sometimes mindless things, which are not necessarily fulfilling. To hang out with friends, shop, watch movies, listen to music and party are activities that most people default to, to avoid the void. There is nothing wrong with those activities, but done in excess, or as a Band-Aid, will not give true fulfillment. There may always be an undertone of boredom during these types of activities.
How about hanging out and allowing ourselves to be ok with emptiness and ask ourselves some good questions when we feel little bored? I wonder what impact this would have… Does perhaps boredom stimulate creativity?
PS The men in the picture perhaps seems to have nothing compared to many of us, but I hardly believe they often feel bored. Why…?
For those of you who have followed me for a while; you know that I took a sabbatical from any stimulants such as coffee, tea with caffeine and alcohol for two weeks.
It was – surprisingly – not hard to take this break and it did me really well. I noticed a shift in my sense of inner calmness, and I enjoyed my own company feeling wholesome. My energy level was good, despite not having any stimulants.
I reintroduced the stimulants again a week ago and have chosen to consume smaller doses of tea and alcohol to maintain the calm sensation. I normally do not drink much coffee as it often makes me a bit too wired.
I woke up feeling very tired from lack of sleep and since I had an unusually hectic program today with several meetings among them one long four-hour meeting as well as close to five-hours of driving, plus some important and pressing decisions to make, I felt inclined to have a cup of coffee to get me started. It did me well, so I went for another cup very shortly thereafter. When that cup also felt ok, I even went for a third cup after lunch and I can tell you, that this was not a very good idea. To drink that much coffee – for someone like me who only drink coffee from time to time, it meant going into a spin that felt horrible.
What was I thinking? Well, that’s it. I wasn’t really thinking. Was I avoiding something? Perhaps… It is known that pain lies at the bottom of any addiction, and that self-indulgence goes hand in hand with addiction. Was I hoping for a different outcome than what I was used to having in the past…? Isn’t that the sign of insanity, to make the same mistake all over again expecting a different outcome, according to Einstein? As I took the third cup I knew I was playing with fire, but I decided to go for it and deal with the consequences later.
Looking back at it now, I cannot understand what came over me. Why did I let myself loose connection with my body and mind and allow myself to indulge this way? What happened to my usual strong willpower?
When we do not get off to a good start in the morning or something challenging happens during the day, it can be easy to get off balance. If we don’t stop and connect with ourselves, but instead keep making wobbly steps, we will keep on going further off balance – instead of what we really need, which is to be gentle and kind to ourselves by bringing us back to balance and a state of wellbeing.
What effect does coffee and other stimulants have on you? Do you sometimes indulge instead of looking at your fear or pain?
Today is the last day of May, the last day of spring, and 150 days since New Year. Time flies. With 215 days to go before 2016, we still got the time to sprout with what lie ready to blossom within us.
For many years now, I have witnessed with great fascination, appreciation, and joy the transition from winter to spring. It truly feels like a huge gift each year as I see the first flowers poke out of the ground, and the fruit trees and flowers turn into blossom. I feel incredibly lucky to live with nature all around me, and to live in a region that has four seasons.
The bursting energy of spring makes us alive; to witness all which has appeared to be dead come alive and blossom. To witness everything that has appeared to be dead come alive. Have you been in awe of it all?
I did not use to feel the same gratitude to the wonder of the seasons and understood later that it said something about me at the time. Goethe phrased it well, “man sees the world what he carries in his heart.”
My grandmother loved pruning her rose garden and it was beyond my comprehension as a child that it could give her so much pleasure to spend her time this way. I am still not an engaged gardener but I have developed a whole new level of appreciation for flowers and things that grow and blossom. I believe that when we do not pay attention to the wonders of life, it can keep us in a rut. When we do pay attention, life becomes more real and rich. As Alice Walker said, Alice Walker expresses it well, “I think it pisses God off if you walk by the color purple in a field somewhere and don’t notice it.”
If a seed or an acorn has the potential to grow and blossom, so do we!
What actions can you do to cultivate the seeds within you?
It is time to bloom!
“There are many ways up the mountain and each of us must choose a practice that feels true to our heart.” – Jack Kornfield
This morning I took a run in Chamonix, France. Our family stayed over after a birthday party last night. It was wonderful to be back to one of the most majestic places on earth. The views and splendid beauty of Mont Blanc and its glaciers against all the fresh, intensely green grass and leaves can ease and please any wired or tired soul.
It has become a bit of a hobby of mine to take photos of heart shaped rocks, or anything else that I see in a heart formation. I have over the years probably collected several hundred photos – if not more – of heart rocks from around the world. I see hearts everywhere, and could have taken many more pictures, but if I had stopped every time I saw a heart rock I would never have arrived to my destination.
Often when I see these heart formations, it makes me think of what the world would be like if more people would live from their heart…
Many people live with their heart protected, and are so disconnected to what makes their heart sing. So many of us live in a bubble of struggle.
What is it going to take for people to realize what power lies in a heart that is set free…?
When will we live in a world where generosity and kindness is prevailing?